You Know You Are a Rat Rodder When... (YKYARRW)

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I've done a few of these, so here's one for Rat Roddin'. Feel free to add some more!

You Know You Are a Rat Rodder When... (YKYARRW)

...you have one of the first batch of RRB t-shirts
...you wear your RRB t-shirt so often it's getting worn out
...you entered the very first RRB build off
...you're collecting parts for the next RRB build off that's not even scheduled yet
...you assemble a diferent bike for every ride
...you can assemble a bike without taking your eyes off of the TV
...you can assemble a bike without interrupting dinner
...you can spot a bike behind a shed even if you're doing 70 on the interstate and there's only a couple of inches of tire showing
...you bring flat-black rattle cans along for rides
...you bring a skate board and some bungee cords along for rides, so you can haul the dumpster finds home
...you only use your truck to haul bikes 'cos you ride everywhere else
...you've got a joint bank account with the LBS to make payments simpler
...you walk into your rat-friendly LBS, and everyone goes "Your_name!"
...you collect angle grinders
...you give each one of your angle grinders a girl's name
...you give each one of your bicycles a Pro-Wrestler type name
...you give each one of your bicycles a name that helps you locate them in your garage, such as: "Isle 4, Row 17, Shelf C"
...you've got bike parts in your car
...you've got bike parts in your bedroom
...you've got bike parts in your office
...you've got bike parts in your kitchen
...you've got bike parts in your girlfriend's house
...your gilfriend doesn't mind you storing bike parts in her house and you think "wow, she's a keeper!"
...your best friend's name is Craig. Craig Slist.
...you show up for work riding a shiny new bike and everyone asks you what's wrong
...you collect handlebars. You can never have too many handlebars
...you're planning on building a small boardtrack on your backyard
...you put ape bars on everything
...you know The Code
...you get a call from NASA about the huge bike pile on your yard: all the metal is interfering with satellite readings
...you like to mess with the purists/collectors minds
...you purchase 100-yard rolls of bike chain
...you can recognize 7.000 different frames from their dropout shapes
...you mix your own blend of coaster brake grease
...you've got more than four bicycle-related scars
...you tell the stories behind each scar to strangers
...all your pants have oil stains
...you have a notebook full of sketches of suicide shifters
...all the neighbourhood kids are hooked on rat bikes, because of you
...you have no furniture on your corridors so it's easier to move bikes around the house
...you have bikes inside the house, especially in the living room and bedroom
...you see nothing wrong with that
...your mother/ spouse/ boyfriend/ girlfriend tells you that you have a bicycle problem
...strangers on the street tell you that you have a bicycle problem
...you reply "Yeah... Insufficient storage space!"
...you sell a bike, and you regret it five minutes later
...you camp out the night before at yard sales
...you go on pilgrimage to Iowa or Chestnut Hollow every year
...you have a nickname
...once, you chopped up a collectible frame
...you read *all* the posts on RRB.com
...you can spot a heavy-duty spoke at 100 yards
...you've pinstripped your angle grinder and your welder
...you have red circles on your calendar to remind you of jumble sales that are 6 months away
...you build a freak bike, just because you are bored
...you save all kinds of junk, and turn it into bike parts
...you have an autograph of kennyp
...you've got IowaParts on speed dial- "They're barn fresh!"
...people just drop off cool bikes on your porch
...you watch the movie E.T. and fast forward to the BMX chase scene
...you think "American Chopper" is a fiction comedy
...you always enter your house through the garage
...you've got a radio in your garage because you spend so much time there
...you've got a cot, a toilet, a fridge, a hot plate, a heater, a telephone and internet access in your garage
...you don't have a garage: you do your buildin' in the kitchen!
...you ride your rat downtown
...your car is kind of cool, too
...you're on a first name basis with all the guys at the recycling plant
...you have developed X-Ray vision so you can look inside barns
...you can cure a cold or a mild depression with a quick bike build
...you dream of having a job at the LBS
...you quit your job at the LBS so you can spend more time in the garage
...you check out fancy motorcycles just to see what parts can be used on a rat
...you do your own saddle upholstery
...you rat your home apliances, lawn mower, nephew's trike, grandma's scooter, mailbox.
...you turn down a hot date because it's Dumpster Dive Friday
...you get withdrawal symptoms because you haven't spray-painted something for a couple of days
...you look away nauteous, every time a lycra-clad roadie on his top-of-the-line carbon fiber bike rolls by
...you know what's wrong with a 3-speed hub just by the sound of it
...you have disassembled your 3-speed hub in the middle of a ride
...you bring spare 3-speed hub parts on rides
...you ask other people on the ride if they would like you to service their hub on the next coffee stop
...you wear out 3-speed hubs
...there's no more room for stickers on your bike
...you watch the Weather Channel to figure out what bike to ride, not to figure out if you're going to ride
...you routinely carry large amounts of beer or scrap metal by bike
...your neighbours know you as the "bike guy"
...you get mail adressed to "Bike guy"
...your car stays on the street 'cos you need the garage space
...you know the difference between 1947 and 1948 Schwinn frames
...you enjoy explaining to strangers the difference between 1947 and 1948 Schwinn frames
...you know lots of great riding stories
...you fix bikes on the road side with nothing but wire, chewing gum, a key chain ring and the foil from an inner tube patch
...you don't wash your bikes, you just ride them in the winter time
...there are oil stains on your bathtub
...there are oil stains on your living room carpet
...you push the LBS mechanic aside and easily remove that stripped bolt
...you have a 10-month waiting list on your projects
...you turn crap to cool

Hugo
 
When bored,you go to the garage and randomly start swapping seats and handlebars. only to end up back where you started...3 hours later :mrgreen:
 
every door in your house has grease smears on it - especially the refrigerator door!

you bought a house on a hill to make sure you could test brakes on new bikes before riding too far from home

you have boxes in your workshop labled with things like 'misc' 'assorted' 'not sure' 'for swap' and then decide to keep all of it when you decided last month that you would take it all to the swap meet.

once a month the garage must be fitted w/ more hooks and shelves to consolidate to gain more space

you pee in a bush by the garage instead of taking the time to go to the bathroom

your not at all concerned with an old thing SHOULD do, but what it COULD do!
 
You think the smell of teflon fortified grease has aphrodisiac like qualities.
 
You are both glad and saddened youre current project is finnished. cause now you don't know where to start next, :idea: and youre wife catches you staring into the garage mesmerized by youre parts :mrgreen:
 
when you have a refrigorator in the garage renamed beer-o-rator

when you work at a LBS and someone else tosses out a bent cruiser wheel and you save it no matter how badly bent it is

when the floor, walls, mis tools have a fine mist of overspray because your work area is also your spray booth

when you defend rust, worn paint, and dents and call it patina and would not have it any other way

when you look at a show only lowrider bike or any other show only anything and say to yourself why?

when you tell others what skip link means and why it is oh so cool

when you have a huge recycle bin outside the garage saving beer cans so you can buy more bikes, or parts and find yourself buying more beer to try and fill the bin faster
 
When you consider your "physical therapy" to mean gathering bike parts, modfying them, putting them together and riding around the neighborhood! :mrgreen:
Every store you go into, you look at their products and envision how to use them on a ratbike!
 
you go to swap meets and hang around till the end to see what vendors throw away

you use vinegar to clean your bare metal bike

you look at your old worn out tires and say to yourself "oh they have at least one more season left in them."

you wake up new years day and go ride with your bros in freezing rain

you pass by the og paint bikes at swaps and head straight for the dude with the pile of rusty bare frames

you GOT MAD SKILZZZZZZZ

you can make a cool trophy out of darn near anything

you have at least 1% of the total posts and responses on RRB
 
when people point out the rust on your bike and ask if your going to fix it.
when they do that and you just smile and laugh.
when you see parts nobody else wants and think of the perfect project for it.
when you look at department store bikes and find them lacking in personality
when ur lady friend cannot understand the appeal to an object they find "ugly"
:D just a few.
true story one time i had taken pictures of a bike i was working on and had one of them up on my computer screen. it was a rusty cahigaurd and a rusty crank i thought it was awsome and put it as my wallpaper. my mother walks in looks at the screen and immediatly went eww. your not gonna buy that one are you. i turned around and had to tel her that it was my bike and it was finished.... :D
thats my stroy for rat roding
 
Your 2 car garage is actually a no car garage.
You can't travel 8 feet in any direction of your house without being able to lay your hands on either a tool or a bike part.
Selling bikes somehow becomes getting more bikes.
You start shopping at the local Goodwill Store, not just for bikes, but also for raw materials for headlights and toolbags.
People ask how many bikes you own and you get stumped and have to actually count them out loud...and you usually miss one or two.
You are magnetically drawn to large trash piles and overfull dumpsters.
You can show people the color of your latest project by pointing to spots on your hands or overspray on your shoes.
You get excited by the new Harbor Freight catalog.
You yearn to pinstripe.
You've upholstered your own seat.
You know what rust tastes like. 8)
 

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