Rick,
I am sorry for your loss, what you are feeling is so normal, each one of us has been in your shoes. I lost my Mom may 2000 when I was eighteen. Just this year I finally feel like I can remember her without re-living the traumatic parts. It takes time, and time will only take you farher away, just always remember to talk to her, and dedicate yourself every day to making new memories. Sometimes I talk to my mom like she was right next to me, you might look funny to the people around you, but it helps. Benny